I love dogs! I love all kinds of dogs, big dogs, little dogs, fat dogs, skinny dogs, vicious dogs ( they need love to...that's probably why they're vicious!) friendly sweet dogs, smelly dogs, fluffy dogs, short haired shedding dogs , you get the picture, if it is of the canine species I pretty much am a sucker for it! Unfortunately not everyone shares the same affection for the four legged variety of humans best friend. Take for example an ex coworker of mine. He hated dogs, he said he didn't really but he did. You could see it every time he would eye ball the dog hair on my coat as I would hang it in the closet next to his. What?...there was an empty hanger next to his black DKNY overcoat. Anyhow, I remember posting some photo's for my wallpaper on my desktop of my pooches and admiringly telling him the names and traits of my little furry children. He really tried to fain interest but I could see something lurking under that facade.
So I asked, "you don't really like dogs do you?" , "Oh I don't know...they're okay I suppose but no...actually no I don't really enjoy them." Well at least he was trying to be all P.C. about it. I asked if he had ever had a pet dog and he was happy to say Nope! and I wouldn't want one either, I did dogsit one time though. And he proceeded to tell me exactly why he thought dogs were stupid, smelly, hairy, annoying , dumb (ya I am being redundant, but so was he) and a complete waste of time and effort. Apparently he and his partner were doing the good deed of helping out a friend by dogsitting their shi tzue or little shit, as i like to refer to them. He said at first it was all , Oh okay...isn't she cute? but the admiration of her cuteness waned quickly as the work of dog care set in. He said she would sit there and just stare at him, he would ask her "are you hungy?" stare...."are you thirsty?" stare....."do you want to go out?" stare , blink, look away and look back again to stare...."Oh well if you aren't going to tell me what you want then tough , you can just sit and stare" He said this was a daily routine which took place most waking moments when they were trapped in the condo together. He also lamented that he would take her down diligently several times a day to do her doo doos , a trek which was down the hall to the elevator , down 11 stories , out to the boulevard to simply stand and wait while she would just look up at him and stare. Sometimes she took a little tinkle but usually nothing substantial. Oh no...nothing until they would return to the apartment and as soon as he would close the door should would drop a little chocolate for him !!! What a good girl!!! He stated that this was her behavior the entire time he was saddled with the tiny staring googly eyed burden. Poor little doggy, I asked him " did you ever pick her up and cuddle her? Did you try to engage with her and maybe play fetch or maybe
just try to keep her entertained a little bit?" His reply, "Nooooooo ? why would I do that? she's dirty and hairy" He said the experience in itself was enough to convince him that dogs are stupid and useless. He said the final straw was when he went to put his designer loafer on (can't remember the label ,seriously, they were loafers people!) anyhoo, getting back to his final straw, he went to put his loafer on and she left him a loaf! haha, pinched a loaf in his loafer! Who's stupid now huh? I think she was probably much smarter then dumbass could ever give her credit for, she knew he didn't like her and so she made his life misery cause he was making her life misery. All she probably wanted was some affection and something that resembled a walk not a jaunt to the elevator then down to the boulevard. I have seen my dogs exhibit stupidity but I have also seen them exhibit signs of intelligence. They sense my sorrow and they sense my joy. Ive seen them smile and Ive seen them pout, Ive seen them show great concern for people in distress and at times Ive seen the deviousness which has rendered them giant loaves of bread off the counter. One thing I know is no matter how crabby Ive been , no matter how horrible my day is and I may have taken it out on them in one form or another ( like not taking them for a walk or ignoring their pleas for belly rubs) they are still there for me. Every morning is truly a new fresh day for them and they are always sooooo thrilled to see me! Im a superstar in their eyes!!! The worlds greatess person ever!!! I am the keeper and holder and distributor of dogs biscuits!!! But it's not just that, I am their Alpha ....and probably Omega for that matter, they truly enrich my life and honestly their unconditional love is what has led me to believe that dog spelled backwards is God for a reason. I like cats and birds but what does that render when you flip it around? Drib? Tac? I rest my case. And with this I ask you, Who doesn't love dogs??? I know I do!
So I asked, "you don't really like dogs do you?" , "Oh I don't know...they're okay I suppose but no...actually no I don't really enjoy them." Well at least he was trying to be all P.C. about it. I asked if he had ever had a pet dog and he was happy to say Nope! and I wouldn't want one either, I did dogsit one time though. And he proceeded to tell me exactly why he thought dogs were stupid, smelly, hairy, annoying , dumb (ya I am being redundant, but so was he) and a complete waste of time and effort. Apparently he and his partner were doing the good deed of helping out a friend by dogsitting their shi tzue or little shit, as i like to refer to them. He said at first it was all , Oh okay...isn't she cute? but the admiration of her cuteness waned quickly as the work of dog care set in. He said she would sit there and just stare at him, he would ask her "are you hungy?" stare...."are you thirsty?" stare....."do you want to go out?" stare , blink, look away and look back again to stare...."Oh well if you aren't going to tell me what you want then tough , you can just sit and stare" He said this was a daily routine which took place most waking moments when they were trapped in the condo together. He also lamented that he would take her down diligently several times a day to do her doo doos , a trek which was down the hall to the elevator , down 11 stories , out to the boulevard to simply stand and wait while she would just look up at him and stare. Sometimes she took a little tinkle but usually nothing substantial. Oh no...nothing until they would return to the apartment and as soon as he would close the door should would drop a little chocolate for him !!! What a good girl!!! He stated that this was her behavior the entire time he was saddled with the tiny staring googly eyed burden. Poor little doggy, I asked him " did you ever pick her up and cuddle her? Did you try to engage with her and maybe play fetch or maybe
just try to keep her entertained a little bit?" His reply, "Nooooooo ? why would I do that? she's dirty and hairy" He said the experience in itself was enough to convince him that dogs are stupid and useless. He said the final straw was when he went to put his designer loafer on (can't remember the label ,seriously, they were loafers people!) anyhoo, getting back to his final straw, he went to put his loafer on and she left him a loaf! haha, pinched a loaf in his loafer! Who's stupid now huh? I think she was probably much smarter then dumbass could ever give her credit for, she knew he didn't like her and so she made his life misery cause he was making her life misery. All she probably wanted was some affection and something that resembled a walk not a jaunt to the elevator then down to the boulevard. I have seen my dogs exhibit stupidity but I have also seen them exhibit signs of intelligence. They sense my sorrow and they sense my joy. Ive seen them smile and Ive seen them pout, Ive seen them show great concern for people in distress and at times Ive seen the deviousness which has rendered them giant loaves of bread off the counter. One thing I know is no matter how crabby Ive been , no matter how horrible my day is and I may have taken it out on them in one form or another ( like not taking them for a walk or ignoring their pleas for belly rubs) they are still there for me. Every morning is truly a new fresh day for them and they are always sooooo thrilled to see me! Im a superstar in their eyes!!! The worlds greatess person ever!!! I am the keeper and holder and distributor of dogs biscuits!!! But it's not just that, I am their Alpha ....and probably Omega for that matter, they truly enrich my life and honestly their unconditional love is what has led me to believe that dog spelled backwards is God for a reason. I like cats and birds but what does that render when you flip it around? Drib? Tac? I rest my case. And with this I ask you, Who doesn't love dogs??? I know I do!
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